I should know better

I should be secure in your love Lord

Not need to need all these external inputs

I should know your love so keenly

I am confident of it and stand firm

I should know that your love is not external

But dwells within me via your Spirit

I should be tuned to your teachings

And your word so much that

I know that I know that I know

The full extent of your love for me

The little I know and am able to perceive

In my limited thinking and perceptions 

Humbles me totally and sometimes I am afraid

That I am just not worth it

But that is what is so unique about you Lord

That the truth is that I am not worth it

But you have loved me anyway!

I should know better!

This is why I am so grateful for your word 

Because I can renew my mind daily

I can re connect daily and be in your full truth

And know by discernment in my spirit

What is true according to you and what is not 

It is so hard to keep up, it is a constant challenge

But your love is like that, inspite of the challenges 

I can just rest , and just be, I can just relax in you

It is actually easier than it looks

I should know better

Because you are patient 

You are faithful